8 Tips for Calming the Chaos in Your Life from Facebook

rest self-care Aug 15, 2019

Here are 8 simple tips to help calm the chaos that can be Facebook. They are simple but they may not be easy to implement.

  1. Decide why you're getting on Facebook before you login or click to open.

  2. Set a timer that you have to physically move to turn off. I often use the timer on my oven. It won't shut off until I push the button and I have to move to go do that.

  3. Connect with a true friend or a truly supportive group where you can be vulnerable and show up in your chaos when you need to.

  4. If there is a group you want to follow but there are too many posts or too many conversations you can search within the group. On your computer, the search is usually in the left sidebar. On your phone, it usually shows up at the top of the screen. Make sure you are in the group when you search. If you are in a parenting group, rather than reading all of the posts, simply search what you're looking for help with. (ie. enter: potty training or chores or encouragement). Read the posts that come up in...
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I Wish I Could Stop Feeling!

What I feel is bad. I don’t know what to do with it. I should be able to stop feeling this way because these feelings aren’t helpful.

Feelings are helpful when you know how they work

Our other senses give us valuable information about our physical world, emotions give us valuable feedback about our relationships - with God, yourself and others. We would never wish to stop seeing or hearing, why do we wish to stop feeling?

Because we don't know how to hear the messages they have for us. 

How do we get the messages

Feel the emotion

How does your body feel? How are you breathing? Where is there peace? Where is there stress? Where is it coming from?

Name the emotion

If you want help you can use a list of emotions to get you started. Name as many emotions and reasons for them as you can.

Ask what the message is

Once you know where the emotions are coming from and what they are called you can ask what the emotions are trying to tell you. Is there someone you need to...

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Why Am I Never Enough?

“Why do I always screw up?!”

I can’t begin to count how many times I’ve asked- yelled, this to myself. So miserable and so desperate to not feel that way.

Why do I feel I’m never enough?

I absorbed the feeling from my childhood of not being good enough. No one told me I wasn’t good enough, but I felt it all the time. 

I decided results fell into two categories, Perfect and Failure. I also picked up the lie that I was my behavior. Therefore I fell into those two categories as well. 

Perfect or Failure. 

I’ve recently seen that Perfect was never defined. If it wasn’t defined I could never know if I achieved it. Therefore I was always a failure. Always. 

Excellence was held up as the standard but it was code for Perfect. There was also a strange sense of being no learning curve. I thought I was just supposed to be able to do something and of course, do it perfectly. 

Totally unattainable, totally below the...

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Embrace Your Mess: Bring it to His Majesty

I am such a mess! Always! Why can’t I get it together? How can God use me when I’m such a huge failure?

This was my heart cry for so many years. I felt so messed up. So convinced I was broken and no one could fix me. Not even God. If He could fix me I was somehow messing up the process so He couldn’t.

I struggled to stretch my insecure, introverted self to go to a women’s retreat with the church. Other women had so much fun and got so much out of them. 

The setting was beautiful. The lodge was in the mountains of Alaska, away from the normal busyness of life. Log walls and candles made the chapel so peaceful. Mealtime was in a stunning log lodge with beautifully set tables. I soaked up the worship and the teaching. 

I felt left out and so out of place the rest of the time; like a kid who has no one to sit with in the lunchroom. The women were nice, they were glad I was there. I was too, and I wasn’t.

I braved sharing my struggle with one of...

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Your Emotions Have Something to Tell You

emotions hearing god prayer Jul 18, 2019

Emotions can be overwhelming.

They are overwhelming for a number of reasons.

  • We don't know what to do with them
  • We don't have proper tools
  • We don't know how to use the tools we have
  • Our emotions don't match our situation

A tool for dealing with overwhelming emotions

I'm putting this out there at the risk of you all thinking I'm crazy. I feel it was an idea from God. It was helpful to me when I first used it and again when I reviewed it.

The tool is having a conversation with your emotions in a place of prayer. I think it will be Holy Spirit speaking. Using your imagination opens your mind to hear things you might not otherwise. 

My conversation

My journal, in a place of prayer, I was talking to disappointment. I see this is a very familiar emotion for me now that I've learned to name them.

Me: Disappointment, why are you in my life?

Disappointment: I come when things don't go as expected and when needs are not met.

M: So when did you first come?

D: You've always known...

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Does it Come Naturally to Recieve God's Love?

Have you ever shared something you were struggling with and felt worse instead of better?

I have. I would share with someone how I was struggling, whether it was with my own self-image, or trying to live the good Christian life, whatever it was. Often the answer was something along the lines of, "just receive God's love".

I wanted to scream or slap them. I wanted to scream, "If I knew how to do that, don't you think I'd be doing it already?" (maybe part of that was it took being pretty desperate for me to ask for help, but that's another topic)

Making it worse

I didn't know how to say they made it worse. It seemed so incredibly obvious that I should just know how to receive God's love. If I wasn't doing it then it had to be because I wasn't trying hard enough, I wasn't being sincere, I wasn't letting God love me. Those things that just weren't helpful at all!

They added more condemnation, shame, and confirmation of the deeply rooted belief I had that I was somehow uniquely...

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What Can We Learn from Celebrating Independence Day?

overcoming prayer Jul 04, 2019

It's always kind of been my impression we’re celebrating the birthday of the United States when we celebrate Independence Day.

We’re not, I mean, we are in a sense, but it's just the day that they declared independence.

Birthing a Country?

It's not the day they gained independence. It's just the day they declared it. Really the birth of the United States would be when the revolutionary war ended, when England finally said, yes, fine, you can be your own country. You're not a colony of England anymore. 

Celebrate declarations

We celebrate the declaration because without making that declaration, that firm resolve, we would never have had independence. They resolved - We're sure this is what God is calling us to. We are sure He is with us in this. We are committing, our lives, our fortunes, our honor. We're giving everything to this. We're declaring this is what we believe and we are giving everything.

Spiritual truth 

The spiritual truth in that is that we can...

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How is Your Integrity? Does it Matter?

hearing god identity Jun 27, 2019
 

Video from Monday with Mukkove, to watch live join me at 11 am Alaska time.

Edited Transcript


I've been talking through seven keys to lasting transformation I have pulled these out of what the Lord has been teaching me through many years. They are what He has used and continues to use to transform me.  

  • The first of those keys is our relationship with God. I've summarized it as “I know Jesus as my Lord and Savior. God is my loving father and Holy Spirit as my ever-present help and comfort.”  
  • Number two is hearing God. I know God's voice through His word and how He speaks to me personally. 
  • Three is identity. I feel I clearly understand how God sees me. 

Today we're going to be talking about integrity. I walk in alignment with how God sees me. 

 I am a Christian life coach, passionate about helping you learn to partner with God for lasting transformation and especially as that impacts you as a mom. That is my driving...

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Do You Struggle with Who You Are? 

 

This video was recorded on Monday with Mukkove, a weekly feature in the Ready. Set. SOAR! Community on Facebook.

Edited transcript:

Do you see your identity as a mother of children whose work is never done or appreciated? 

OR 

Do you see yourself as a mother of world changers - the laundry, dishes, and every other hard or mundane thing of motherhood is a tool for their training?  


Do you see yourself as a victim of your circumstances and your children even?  

OR  

Do you see yourself as an empowered woman with a very high calling?  

There are so many things that shape who you truly are and how you see yourself- Your parents, events you experience, words that are spoken over you, circumstances that you're in, your personality, your gifts, the huge variety of experiences you have, and most importantly your perspective of each of those...

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Can You Say That Again, God?

 

Does God speak? Can you hear Him?

This video was recorded on Monday with Mukkove, a weekly feature in the Ready. Set. SOAR! Community on Facebook.

Edited transcript:
I felt like I failed all the time and 
was miserable. And it didn't matter how hard I tried. It didn't work. Other people would come from a conference or read a book and say, ”This was life-changing! Just do this. I would try to do that and it just wouldn't work. It just would convince me, It's me. I'm severely broken. I'm severely messed up, severely flawed. 

I wanted to be pleasing to the Lord and wanted to be impacting people for the Lord. Trying harder was not working.  

When I learned to hear God's voice for myself, I began to be able to see myself the way God sees me. That allowed Him to transform me through transforming my thinking instead of me trying to transform my thinking without having that...

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