I’m an emotional wreck. I can’t think. I can’t hold back the tears and this intense ache.
A clear thought breaks through the suffocating emotion.
This hurts way more than it should. This is just normal teen stuff. They want to be with their friends. It’s a really busy season.
Why is it hurting so bad? What is it I’m really feeling?
I’m feeling SO rejected!
Rejection and I go way back. Way, way back. That’s why this hurts so bad. It’s time to heal.
I’m feeling pressure, stress, from other’s choices. I feel rejected. A crazy thing about feelings is I can feel rejection without ever having been rejected. This isn’t about blaming or figuring out who rejected me. It’s about me examining the wound with the Lord and receiving His healing so I can deal with current events as just that – current, present – not clouded and confused by past wounds.
Looking at pressure like the lobster, it’s time to grow.
Lord, I come before You knowing You want my healing, You want my heart as broken as it is. I ask You to show me my part. I submit to Your loving direction for where to go from here.
Where is this intense emotion coming from?
This pressure is coming from rejection in your past.
I have so often felt rejected, not good enough for many reasons.
I was too sensitive, too quiet, too smart, too naïve. I am rejectable. There is something uniquely wrong with me. No one wants to spend time with me. I’m no fun.
I forgive those who have rejected me including myself (you don’t need to read my list ). I release them and myself from my judgment. I pray blessings and the experience of the Father’s love for each of them.
Heavenly Father, I receive healing for my wounds of rejection.
What is the truth?
I made you exactly as I want you to be. Being or feeling rejected in the past does not mean you are rejected now. I will never reject you. You are accepted in Me and can handle any rejection or feelings that come.
When I believe I am accepted by the God of the universe I can love without fear. I can see where I lack skills to handle emotions and learn them.
Is there anything You want to tell me, Father?
I love you. I not only accept you, I chose you before time began. I paid for you with the life of Jesus. I will never reject you. Be patient and stay in the process of healing.
I am reading a couple of books, following their steps for healing and learning skills I lack. I started a Bible study for encouragement, growth, an accountability.
When feelings of rejection rise up I spiritually step back into His presence and His acceptance.